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Tag Archives: home maintenance

Friendly Neighborhood Pest

Roofer dude who rings my bell, What tales of pain and woe you tell Of damage done by wind and ice, And you’ll inspect for free. (How nice!) It’s entertainment for my mind To guess what horrors you would find. Perhaps the flashing’s rusted through, The shingles cracked and crooked too. The decking’s bad as [...]

House Poor

The roof needs replacing, The plumbing is leaky, There’s mold in the walls And the floorboards are creaky. The wiring is faulty. The overhead flashes. A house is a thief, And it knows where your cash is! 

Leaf Beef

Though I keep it together in nice, sunny weather, I’m always a wreck when it rains. For the leaves that have fallen combined with the pollen Are constantly clogging the drains. “It sucks to be me!” I despondently mutter. A homeowner’s mind’s never out of the gutter!