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Tag Archives: Fox News

Don’t Let the Door Hit You!

Goodbye, Mr. Beck. A reality check Has determined your show Is a shark-jumping wreck! Your paranoid views On progressives and Jews Are too warped and demented For even Fox News! Your sponsors all went, For your logic was bent And your ratings had plummeted Forty percent! It’s a crime, you insist, But the network is [...]

Ladies and Gentlemen, The Comedy Stylings of Juan Williams!

I just flew in from Washington And boy was it a pain! There’s a lot that makes me nervous When I’m getting on a plane! They’ll give me sixteen inches For my twenty-two-inch butt. They’ll be out of Johnny Walker, I can feel it in my gut! On my left will be a cretin Droning [...]

Shirley You Exaggerate!

I’m editing film clips of Shirley Sherrod To show her as part of a terrorist squad. I’m making it look like she’s cheating at poker While plotting nefarious schemes with The Joker. I’ll show her in Hell selling Satan her soul, Just to see if Tom Vilsack will swallow it whole!

No Required Reading

Little Sarah Palin couldn’t name a mag she read. She didn’t keep a “Newsweek” or a “Time” beside her bed. Neither “Harpers” nor “The Nation” ever made her reading list, Nor the one with all the fancy words, that darned “Economist!” She never looked at “Fortune” for the latest on the stocks. Which made her [...]