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Tag Archives: 2012 presidential race

The Debate In Brief

R. I can make our nation strong. O. Everything you say is wrong! R. Attacking me gets nothing done. O. Wrong again! (Besides, it’s fun.) R. I’ll restore our fortunes fast! O. With policies from decades past? R. Chaos in the Middle East! O. Well, bin Laden’s gone at least! R. Can’t just kill our [...]

The Debate In Brief

R. Bring back jobs? I know how! O. Notice how I’m feisty now? R. Hey, I’ve got a five-point plan! O. Just ONE point, and I’m no fan. R. Oil production dropped. O. It grew! R. Did not! O. Did too! R. Did not! O. Did too! R. Numbers all add up. O. Since when? [...]

Great Debate

Biden and Ryan, your zingers were flyin’. You kept us all riveted, round after round. The smirking was snarky. “You’re full of malarkey!” “You’re under duress to make up for lost ground!” “Cut taxes? And how!” “Oh, you’re Kennedy now?” You bickered and jockeyed to get the last word. You’ve each got a vision. I’ve [...]

Digging Deeper

What’s happening, Mitt? Are you playing for laughs? Are you bent on outdoing Joe Biden in gaffes? You bungled on Libya, wouldn’t repent, Then insulted a full forty-seven percent! And just as your handlers thanked God you were through, You added a dig at the Mexicans too! You want some advice? You can still make [...]

Independent Candidate

I’m going to vote for Daffy Duck. With him, we just might be in luck! He’s got a certain vision and he’s not a party hack. Though some may think he’s just a goof, He’s quite assassination-proof. You shoot him and he smolders, but he always bounces back! He lives right up to all the [...]

Mitt and Clint

Said Romney to Eastwood, “That stunt was a blunder. You’ve hogged up the spotlight and stolen my thunder! The headlines are yours, and I’m kicked to the curb. Now everyone’s “Eastwooding!” Jeez, it’s a verb! That’s all they remember. It just isn’t fair. Oh, save your apologies. Talk to the chair!”

The Speech In Brief

I accept your nomination, Humbled by your approbation! Here’s Paul Ryan.  He’s the bomb. Super fella.  Loves his mom! Last election: “Change and hope.” Four years later: Better?  Nope! I’m a plain midwestern guy, Raised on good ol’ apple pie. Were we optimists?  Darn straight! Wasn’t that Neil Armstrong great? Father came from Mexico. Built [...]