Mr. Limbaugh, I apologize.
I humbly take it back.
I sincerely never meant it
As a personal attack.
Perhaps it was an impudent
And thoughtless thing to say,
But I meant “disgusting pinworm”
In the very nicest way!
I regret that I described you
As an ape without the class,
That I said you were a pimple
On the anus of an ass.
When I called you scummy maggot’s puke,
Who knew you’d hold a grudge?
And likewise when I said your brain
Was Port-a-Potty sludge!
Wanker, douchebag, asshole, putz,
Tweeker skunked on meth,
Dickless wonder, tub o’ lard,
And dingleberry breath,
Pig-molester, toe jam licker,
Skid mark, jackoff, tool…
For all those things I’ve said and more,
I’m sorry. So we’re cool?
10 Comments
Brilliant as always, Scott!! Thanks!
Bravo!!!!
AMEN!
Thank you for this masterful missive!
Bookmarking you…
Miss you, dude!
Well done! Loved this one! (well, I love all of them)
Thank you for “A Public Apology,” especially for its beautiful array of inspired insults.
I always love your stuff!
I am enjoying these…thanks.
Just wanted to say that I love this poem, and I wrote one myself about the asshole that I think you’ll enjoy. http://artlesspoems.wordpress.com/2012/06/27/bffs-2/
and in performance: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkKsLMzou8Q
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