Two thousand light years distant,
Round a star called Kepler-9
There spins an earth-like planet
Of a promising design.
If higher life’s survived the droughts,
Volcanos and diseases,
It may be full of Starbucks,
Chick-fil-A’s and Chuck E. Cheeses.
Perhaps one day we’ll travel there,
And not to offer battle,
But just to give them anal probes
And mutilate their cattle.