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Monthly Archives: March 2012

Rotten Reboot

“Dark Shadows” was a gothic soap That baby boomers dared to hope Would one day reach the movie screens With grander, more horrific scenes. Then skies would brood and ghosts would fly, Enhanced by modern CGI. We’d gasp, we’d tremble, some would shriek. We’d FEEL the wrath of Angelique! And so it seemed a welcome [...]

Slimy Goodness

My favorite soda’s lemon-lime. My favorite chips are corn, I think. But as for dietary slime, I’ll always take the kind that’s pink! Its subtle flavor’s quite complex, A gourmet treat that’s fine and rare, A blend of gristle, skin and necks With just a hint of derriere. It isn’t, as the critics say, A [...]

Takei Curious

I’m not a big celebrity Or star of stage and screen. You’ll never see my causes hyped In “People” magazine. I’ve got no flair for drama And I like myself that way, But I still can’t help but wonder What it’s like to be Takei! I’d be charming, I’d be witty, Never nasty, crass or [...]

A Public Apology

Mr. Limbaugh, I apologize. I humbly take it back. I sincerely never meant it As a personal attack. Perhaps it was an impudent And thoughtless thing to say, But I meant “disgusting pinworm” In the very nicest way! I regret that I described you As an ape without the class, That I said you were [...]