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Monthly Archives: January 2011

Thanks for Suing, Come Again!

Oh Taco Bell, oh Taco Bell, You bravely gave ‘em taco hell! You took no crap, no guff, no grief When some demanded, “Where’s the beef?” Your fierce rebuttal packed a punch: “We deep fry dudes like you for lunch!” Revenge served hot can be a treat. New ad: “Yo quiero lawyer meat!”

Amadeus Unplugged

When Mozart’s young genius was still in the rough, Before he had penned his canonical stuff Like his classic quartets or the Magical Flute, He wrote a Concerto for Musical Fruit. The tones were exquisite, the harmonies rare When the soloist boldly burst forth with his air, A light, breezy piece, a delectable medley, While [...]

Sign of the Times

The zodiac is changing up For reasons quite arcane. Astrology enthusiasts Are in the House of Pain! A Libra’s now a Virgo Which may mystify and spook us, And a poor December baby Has become an Ophiuchus! If you’re an Ophiuchus, You’re good-humored yet erratic. You’re prone to frequent flatulence And therefore aromatic. As a [...]

Fighting Words

We’re patriotic warriors across the USA. We invoke the “blood of tyrants” in the words of Thomas J. We’ve got ‘em in our crosshairs, yes, we’re loaded and we’re locked, But when someone pulls the trigger, then we’re shocked, shocked, shocked! We love the Constitution and the old red, white and blue. Our remedy for [...]

Friendly Neighborhood Pest

Roofer dude who rings my bell, What tales of pain and woe you tell Of damage done by wind and ice, And you’ll inspect for free. (How nice!) It’s entertainment for my mind To guess what horrors you would find. Perhaps the flashing’s rusted through, The shingles cracked and crooked too. The decking’s bad as [...]