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Category Archives: The Internet

Cops and Bloggers

What is it like For Lieutenant John Pike? Has his thuggish bravado Now taken a hike? With an arrogant swagger He brandished his can, And bringing the pain Made him feel like a man! But now he’s a joke, Spraying hobbit and elf, The Munchkins and Yoda And Jesus himself! He’s sprayed JFK And the [...]

MewTube

(Tip of the digital pen to the bizarre brains at Rathergood.com.) The Internet is made, it seems, Of facts and falsehoods, fleeting memes, Of Hitler rage and British brats, But most of all, it’s made of cats. Cats too numerous to tell. Cats that make us LOL. Cats that love to squeeze in tight. Spartan [...]

You Know Who You Are…

Dear Facebook friend, your latest post Is even more obscure than most. You start it with a cryptic “You,” Which begs the reader’s question, “Who?” What follows then, oblique, abstruse, Makes Pynchon look like Dr. Seuss! It’s obfuscation at its best. Am I supposed to be impressed?  

Web of Life

I’ve seen the cutest kittehs And the wacky treadmill dance. I’ve LOL’d at Trololo And Hitler’s countless rants. The classic Numa Numa song Still haunts my every dream. The Internet is now the world, And life is but a meme.

An Ephemeral Rhyme

“I’ve forged a creation more lasting than bronze,” Said the poet whose odes had gone viral In the town on the Tiber when nothing was Cyber And writing was mostly papyral. But modern-day e-authors write in the Cloud, Where trillions of memes must compete, Where verses can claim half a second of fame And are [...]

Everything is Awesome

I’m now a fan of raisin bran, Hurricanes, Uzbekistan, Watermelon, comets, curling, Pounding Jaeger bombs and hurling, Chopsticks, dirt, Italian ice, The Elgin Marbles, body lice, Chunk light tuna in the can… If it’s on Facebook, I’m a fan!

Happy Place

When life gets tense, a bit off-kilter, I find escape in Metafilter. I hobnob there with cybergeeks, Web designers, gaming freaks, Ska musicians, math professors, Artists, cooks and window-dressers. I see the most amazing comics, Hot debates on economics, Classic photos culled from “Life,” Shatner crooning “Mack the Knife,” An interview with Colonel Klink, Perhaps [...]

Way-Too-Social Network

I’d likely meet a stripper With the body of a troll Or a Bible-thumping Jesus freak Who’s out to save my soul, A goth with too much attitude, A biker dude who’s well tattooed And fat and drunk and bare-ass nude Upon the toilet bowl! How wasted would I have to get To try my [...]

A Message from your Friendly Facebook Team

It’s time to change Facebook around! We’ll rebuild the whole thing from the ground! Your pokes, applications And group invitations Were simply too easily found! The revamp of Two Thousand Ten Is the coolest since we-don’t-know-when! Though you’ll tell us to shove it, You’ll soon learn to love it. And that’s when we’ll change it [...]

Antisocial Gaming

I’m nuts about Factory Farmville! It’s a game where the fun never stops. To begin, all you need Is some chemical feed From genetically modified crops! The livestock in Factory Farmville Are confined in the best of conditions. Who cares if the smell Is like hog turds from hell If you’ve greased all the right [...]